Random Thoughts #33: Wind

I walked into a men’s public restroom and after I was struck with the sudden assault on one of my senses, I wondered if the global population all stood together with their backs facing in one predetermined direction and broke wind at exactly the same exact time if we’d blow up the planet. Then I thought that’s impossible because there’s no way that 7.5 billion people are all going to be able to toot their horn at exactly the same time, but I figured it was something interesting to think about. Then I thought what if the global population all stood with our backs facing in one predetermined direction and at the same exact time we all took a deep breath to the count of four and forcibly blew it out. Would we make the world spin faster for a short period of time or would we influence weather? Then I thought if we all referred to ourselves as a “global population” rather than ‘Americans’ or ‘Russians’ or ‘Israelis’ or ‘Palestinians’ or ‘Christians’ or ‘Muslims’ that maybe we’d all get along better? Then I thought that the idea of global harmony was maybe the silliest thought of my three thoughts.