My personal ad

Everyone nowadays seems to be turning to online personal ad sites to meet someone. You probably know someone, or have seen a commercial, so you know what I’m talking about. I thought maybe it’s time I took the plunge so I wrote an ad and thought I’d share my first draft here for feedback.

Hi. I’m a good person and I don’t want to break the law. If you’d like to break away and break bread with me that’d be cool. We can go to that restaurant near where they’re getting ready to break ground for something or other. I’d suggest we eat somewhere where the food isn’t too bizarre because I wouldn’t want either of us to break into a cold sweat – or worse, break out in tears – over what to order. Heaven forbid either of us should be so nervous that we break out in a rash.

I should probably break the news to you at this point that my hope is that you’re a good conversationalist because I’m not and you’ll probably need to break the silence at some point. Or points. And if you don’t like that then it’d be ok for you to make a clean break.

And I have good manners, so you don’t have to worry about my having to break wind at any time.

If things work out then who knows, we might end up “Reelin’ and Rockin’ until the break of dawn”

(Ragtag Daily Prompt: BREAK)

Reelin’ and Rockin’ with the GOAT. All righty?