Playing Baseball the “Twins Way”

Define “Frustration” in three words: Minnesota Twins Baseball.

This is a rant. You’ve been warned.

And you wonder why the Twins suck? OK, maybe you don’t wonder why the Twins suck, but they do, and the reason why isn’t because they never do anything to field a winning team; it’s because they never do anything to field a winning team but then to out and pretend that they are.

Look at the Red Sox. They sign Rick Porcello in 2015, and in 2016 he wins a Cy Young award. In 2016 they they sign David Price, a 2012 Cy Young award winner. Today they signed Chris Sale who hasn’t won a Cy Young award, but he’s been a finalist for the award for the last five years. If you believe in the maxim that good pitching beats good hitting, then you might want to fly out to Las Vegas and check out the odds on the Red Sox playing late in October next year.

Look at who the Twins. Who have signed recently? We got one bum from Korea last year, Byung Ho Park, who got sent to the minors mid-season because he couldn’t hit and once down there at AAA he continued to suck; and we got another bum from Japan a few years ago, Tsuyoshi Nishioka, who sucked, got injured, recovered, still sucked, played a little for us in the minors where he, yes, sucked, came back up, sucked and eventually asked for his release, got it, and who sucked so bad that he’s not even playing in this country anymore because, yes, he sucked that bad. And am I alone in finding it sort of funny when a guy who sucks asks for his release from a team? That’s sort of like asking for an ankle weight on a sinking ship. Anyway, then we got an aging Torii Hunter for a year in 2015 and we got a manager who can’t manage but is apparently cool simply because he’s from St. Paul and everyone knows his name.

And the Twins interest in free agent pitchers for 2017? Like there’s any interest in free agent anything for this team, but they’re supposedly – if the news can be trusted – interested in a guy (and like this comes as a surprise to Twins fans) who’s a low-cost option. He’s San Diego’s Clayton Richard and he’s another pitch to contact guy who pretty much fits the definition of a bum. His last good year was in 2012 when he led the National League in games started (33) and hits allowed (228) and homeruns allowed (31) while putting up a blazing hot 14-14 record. Now he’s just another middle reliever who tries to hold games for the closer by letting opposing batters hit the ball while he (and the rest of the team and the fans at the park and at home) holds his breath that it’s caught. And he takes a spot start here and there when there’s a double header.

So, you see? Like I said: Bum.

But when you put it in perspective, I’m sorry, when you put it in Minnesota Twins perspective, Chris Sale signed for $38 million for three years and Clayton Richards will probably sign for about $5 million for two years with a bunch of incentives which he won’t meet because. Yes, you guessed it.

Sadly, this is the “Twins Way”. A bunch of unseasoned young guys with no major league experience who learn on the job while marking time until they can become free agents, surrounded by a bunch of middle-aged, bargain basement pick ups through free agency or trades, all led by a manager who is better left to be the subject of another rant sometime around mid-May when the team is in last place and down by 10 games.

Sadly, I don’t see this formula changing. The Red Sox have a goal of winning a World Series championship and they go out and actively take steps to achieve that goal by spending (a lot of) money toward that end. The Twins just want to play around .500 baseball with fingers crossed that something on their patchwork quilt team sticks and they can bump up to a winning record and, with luck, back their way into the top half of the division and maybe, if the stars are all aligned, a playoff spot while, keeping their payroll down at a level that guarantees the owners make a profit with just 1.5 million fans turning out at the park.

I guess as long as Minnesota baseball fans are more interested in the new food offerings at Target Field then they are with the level of play on Target Field then this is about what we can expect.

But it’s baseball, right? And we love the game, right?

OK, that’s my rant. Now let’s get back to the winter meetings and keep our fingers crossed for a trade with the Dodgers that gives them Brian Dozier and gives us their top three pitching prospects.