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Minnesota Twins: Turn out the lights

August 10, 2015

I was going to blog about the Twins but the team, the way they’re playing now, is some seriously depressing shit. Back in the month of May when they were the best team in baseball it was enough to make a guy think that this could be it, this could be the year we go all the way. This could be…


That was the sound of reality hitting.

Since the All Star break the Twins have been one of the worst teams in baseball with a 6-16 record in their last 22 games. And the majority of games haven’t even been competitive as they’ve been outscored 60 to 28 over their last eight games.


For fans of onomatopoeia (yes, I had to look up the spelling in a dictionary) that was the sound of me accepting Minnesota baseball reality.

So baseball angst doesn’t drive me crazy I make fun of the team whenever I can and after last Saturday night’s embarrassing 17-4 loss to the last place Cleveland Indians in which our reserve outfielder, Shane Robinson, was put in to pitch the ninth inning, I thought the Twins might have better luck keeping opposing teams from scoring against them at will if they simply let opposing batters hit off a tee and then add an extra outfielder.

‘But hey, dude,’ you’re saying. ‘There’s still a lot of baseball left to be played and the AL Central isn’t the strongest division and the Twins could, they really could, they really, really could put it together and make a run for it and…’

Sorry to be a spoilsport, imaginary voice inside my head, but for anyone who still holds out any hope of this team vying for a Wild Card spot, just look at our recent record against the two current Wild Card qualifiers, the Angels (1-2) and the Blue Jays (0-4). And should dreams come true and we do make the playoffs then does anyone think we have a chance, with this current roster, against the Yankees?

‘Yeah, well…’

Yeah, well is right.

It’s not all gray skies in Twins Territory. The team has won six of their last 22 games. Joking. Making fun. Maintaining sanity, remember? OK, Miguel Sano has been a lot of fun to watch and should Byron Buxton ever learn how to hit an off-speed pitch, he’ll also be a lot of fun to watch. That’s not a slam on Buxton, just an observation that he’s not quite ready yet for major league breaking pitches.

I have no idea how to fix the 2015 team. Torii Hunter does his best as team leader but he can’t do it all and no one else on the team (Hello? Joe Mauer, you out there?) seems to be stepping up. So I’ll put the blame onto management. General Manager Terry Ryan who sent a not-so-subtle message to the players back during the last week of July when he didn’t make any trades for guys that could have helped maintain momentum and provide a push toward the playoffs. Not doing anything, for all intents and purposes, told the team that’s it’s OK to lose this year, we don’t expect you to win. And manager Paul Molitor, a guy I thought would be a bad manager ever since he originally turned the job down back in 2001 because of his fear of contraction, needs to take a lesson from Yogi Berra who said that “Baseball is 90% mental…” I don’t believe, Mr. Molitor has what it takes to get into the player’s heads and tell them that wearing a major league baseball uniform, a Minnesota Twins uniform, means something more than just a paycheck. Remember Billy Martin? He could do that, and while people might argue over Billy Martin, he produced winners everywhere he went. Including Minnesota.

I expect the Twins to be big sellers come September when the contenders are looking for that one little key to give them the edge in post-season. The upside to that is that it should net us a bunch of good prospects for the team to sell us and for the media to drool over and who, if all goes according to plan, should help us drive for a pennant run in around, oh, I don’t know, 2022.

How to fix the Minnesota Twins: #‎mientkiewicz‬

One Comment leave one →
  1. Monica Lee permalink
    August 10, 2015 6:31 pm

    I only liked this, not because I like how shitty the Twins are playing, but because I liked how you wrote about it and made it entertaining. Sigh…


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