The Covers Pulled Close

WESat: October 11, 2014 – Eewww, That’s Gross!

This Week’s Challenge:

Using prose or poetry, tell us what you or your partner does that drives the other crazy. If that hits too close to home, make it a “fiction” story using fake names but retaining the overall idea of what it does that drives one partner crazy.

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The Covers Pulled Close *

Lying in bed, the covers pulled close,
next to my love with thoughts of. . .  who knows.

Suddenly a roll, suddenly a rumble,
something a little more than a standard gut grumble.

That familiar spasm, that pinched belly squeeze
I don’t want to lose it so I raise up my knees.

I grab hold of the covers, pull them over our heads
and let loose a thunder blast, rocking the bed.

With the covers held tight she’s stuck ‘neath my tent,
cozy and air tight with nary a vent.

I start to laugh loudly and she says, “That’s not funny.”
“But it’s a perfect Dutch Oven, just enjoy it with me honey.”

“Don’t honey me,” she says with a grunt
and I feel the chill spread like a December cold front.

I pull back the covers and set my love free,
she doesn’t say thank you, just puts her back facing me.

With my thoughts of ‘who knows’ now withered and dashed
gnarled and shriveled, hopelessly smashed

I decide I’d better wake up and come to my senses
so I start thinking of excuses to try and mend fences.

“I’m sorry,” I say, just one thought to imbue,
“I did it to show you how much I love you.”

“That’s a helluva a way to show one you care,
by clogging her nose up and curling her hair.”

“I won’t do it again, hon,” I sheepishly say
when I notice she’s moving a little further away.

“Damn right you won’t,” was her final decree.
“If you ever have hopes of sleeping with me.”

Shamed and humiliated I swore to atone
‘cuz the last thing I wanted was to sleep all alone.

* Not based on a true** story

** Depending on your definition of “true”