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The Apple of my Eye

May 14, 2012
tags: ,

Do you like apples? I do. I don’t like apple juice, it makes me sick, but I do like apples. I don’t like all apples. I’m not fond of the tart or mushy ones, unless they’re backed into apple pie, but the really sweet and crunchy ones, I like those a lot. Like Fuji apples; those are really good. Or Jazz, they’re also good although I don’t know if they’re good enough to justify the extra money. Another favorite is SweeTango which is a hybrid apple from here in Minnesota. I guess the name is supposed to tell us it’s both sweet and tart, but I’ve never noticed the tartness before. You can’t get them for another four months so forget about them for now.

The worst part of eating an apple for me is, ironically, also one of the best things about good apples: the juiciness. I don’t like when you bite into an apple and the juice runs down your fingers and hands and gets sticky. I also don’t like when the juice gets all over your face. The workaround, of course, is to wear a bib and cut the apple up into wedges, but there’s something unmanly about a bib-wearing apple wedge eater. Unless it’s medically necessary or something, apple wedges seems like something you’d get with a peanut butter sandwich in a lunch your mom packed for you.

Generally, eating an apple happens without consequence but not today. Today there was a big consequence. I’ve got a bit of apple peel stuck between the upper lateral incisor and eye tooth on the right side. (I looked up the names of the teeth, I didn’t know them) That peel bit is stuck in there pretty good and I don’t have any dental floss with me so it’s not going anywhere until I get home. Of course I can’t keep my tongue from worrying away at it. Yes, I even tried a fingernail and that didn’t work.

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One Comment leave one →
  1. Word Nerd permalink
    May 14, 2012 1:25 pm

    I’m a wedger. I don’t care if it makes me look unmanly. I tend to favor Gala apples or when I want to throw money around all willy-nilly, Honey Crisps. Anything but Red Delicious, which are, in my unmanly view, utterly lacking in deliciousness.

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