American Idol Goes to the Movies

So Jennifer Lopez is the most beautiful woman in the world? Am I the only person who doesn’t care? Gob on a lot of make up and have a team of stylists and dressmakers and a lot of people, maybe even me, will be good looking.

On to the show.

Paul McDonald: One week later and I shouldn’t still be thinking about what Paul did to Folsom Prison Blues, but here it is and here I am thinking about what Paul did to Folsom Prison Blues and because of that I can’t really enjoy his version of Bob Seger’s Old Time Rock and Roll. However, even if I wasn’t thinking about last week, I don’t know if I would have enjoyed Paul this week. I still like Paul’s voice and his personality, but there’s something too frantic about him when he starts rocking that I don’t like. And the outfits. I’m not a big fan of singers who wear “outfits” as opposed to just clothes. Has Neil Young or Bob Dylan or Jerry Jeff Walker or John Prine ever worn an outfit on stage? To be honest, the frantic Paul scares me a little and when he gets like that – stepping around and banging a tambourine off his chest, I start wondering if he has handlers standing by on alert off-stage. On the plus side, the saxophone player was nice looking. The judges, of course, loved him. I didn’t get it.

Lauren Alaina: When I think of movies I don’t think of Hannah Montana and that thought hammers home that I’m way out of the American Idol demographics. I know that, but I don’t like to think about it, and last night Lauren made me think that aside from the contestant’s family members, I might be the oldest person in the country watching American Idol. I like Lauren, but I didn’t think this performance was anything special or unique. After the show I listened to the original on Youtube and not only was Lauren’s performance karaoke in comparsion, but it was bad karaoke.

Stefano Langone: Stefano the Pia Killer. Stefano the Man Responsible for Lovely Pia Going Home. Stefano, the Man Who Took Pia Away From Me. The problem with Stefano for me is that every song he sings sounds the same. Having said that, if I was 15-year-old girl, I’d have my bedroom wallpapered with so many Stefano pictures that my parents wouldn’t bother to put me into therapy, they’d put me straight into the psych ward. As far as Stefano’s performance, he was still in shock and singing for his life and I think he did a good job. I don’t hate him, even if he did kill Pia.

Scotty McCreery: Scotty’s starting to get on my nerves a little bit. At first I liked the funny singing faces and the funky way he held the microphone but now I’m getting the feeling that he’s going out of his way to do it and that it’s his gimmick. Like Jimmy, I would have loved to hear Scotty sing Everybody’s Talking. Whatever song he did wind up doing didn’t do anything for me. I really hate the thought that Scotty and Stefano could be battling it out at the finale as the top two finalists. Talk about Yawn City.

Casey Abrams: Why is Casey Abrams on American Idol? Casey is more than just a singer and he’s light years ahead of anyone else on the show talentwise and as a Casey fan, I don’t care if he goes home tonight or if he wins the whole thing because I’m confident that no matter what happens, Casey will record a great album of music. Not overly produced garbage with catchy, cliché-ridden lyrics and enhanced by auto-tune and other electronic silliness, but music. Good music. Good old fashioned music.

Haley Reinhart: To paraphrase Billy Crystal impersonating Fernando Lamas, “It’s better to look good than to sing good.” Haley looked good, but her singing last night didn’t do anything for me. Too much shouting and screaming and over-singing. I look at Haley and all I see is a Girls Gone Wild commercial.

Jacob Lusk: Uh oh, a song that I really like and that isn’t good news for me on American Idol. But you learn something new everyday. I know that Art Garfunkle has an amazing voice and while I knew that Jacob Lusk had a good voice, I learned last night that he, too, has an amazing voice. To really appreciate Jacob I need to separate Jacob the singer from Jacob the person and when I can do that, as I did last night, I’m blown away. Bridge Over Troubled Water is a pretty incredible song and in the short time he had, I think Jacob proved that he could equal the original. Yeah, that’s bold, I know, but I loved him last night. And the cufflinks were cool, too. Along with hats, men need to wear more cufflinks. Afterthought: Who out there isn’t looking for, or hasn’t looked for, that bridge?

James Durbin: Every hat I own (and every future pair of cufflinks that I will one day own) is off to James for standing his ground and, like Casey, being strong enough to trust in the faith he has in himself and his art to do his song, his way. Not to take anything away from the mentors, whoever they are, but James was right. I didn’t care for the Zakk Wylde being out there with him because A) James didn’t need the help, and B) It was too showy for me.

Tonight’s Best:
Casey, James, Jacob

Tonight’s Worst:
Haley, Paul, Scotty

My Bottom Three:
Haley, Lauren, Paul

America’s Bottom Three:
Casey, Paul, Haley

Going Home:
Paul

Look ma, no fancy outfits or electronic gimmicks, just good, old fashioned music right here!