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Kid tested?

November 24, 2010

A month ago I started to experiment with a gluten-free diet. No real reason since I don’t have an allergy to wheat, but I was thinking who knows if I have a sensitivity, so I thought I’d give the diet a try for awhile and see what happens. A week later I’m at the grocery store and I’m looking at cereals and I see that Kix, a cereal I’ve never eaten before (and made right here in Minneapolis, Minnesota) is on sale. Two boxes for four dollars – a steal! I look at the label and see the cereal contains no wheat so I get some. I have no idea if it’s any good but the worst case scenario is I find a new breakfast cereal and I’m not out a lot of money. This morning I had a bowl, and this is some of the worst cereal I’ve ever eaten. Kix has no corn flavor to speak of and considering it contains a fair amount of sugar, there’s no real sugary taste. The cereal isn’t interesting to look at, they look like a bowl of spider egg sacs, it has no marshmallow bits, no fun colors or shapes, and the little yellow air-puffed balls don’t make any entertaining crunchy sounds when you chew them. On the arbitrary scale of ‘Cereal Goodness’, ten being the best cereal you ever had, blah, blah, blah, I’m putting Kix down, with generosity, at a one.

I remember seeing Kix commercials with all those cute kids doing cute things and they all ended with the product’s catchy tagline: “Kix. Kid tested, mother approved” I don’t deny that Kix was tested by kids, but I’d like to know what it was tested against. A bowl of dirt clumps? A bowl of warm mustard? Assuming the kids actually did test the real cereal (and I’m not saying they didn’t), rather than know their mothers approved of the product, I’d like to know the results of those kid’s tests because I have a difficult time believing the cereal passed those tests.

My worst case scenario of thinking if all else failed I’d wind up with a new breakfast cereal? I was wrong. Worst case scenario is I wind up with a bunch of yellow spider egg sacs in the trash.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. November 26, 2010 1:26 am

    I agree…Kix is nasty. Even if you pour sugar on top…it is still nasty. Thanks for the Paul Revere and The Raiders clip. I was in love with all of them when I was in 8th grade. You made me feel young again.


  2. Teresa permalink
    November 29, 2010 11:04 pm

    It has always looked like cardboard to me, so I steered clear of Aisle 7 and that god awful cereal.

    It didn’t matter if it was 2 boxes for $4.

    I’m sorry you had to waste space in the trash can with that crap.


    • Michael Fishman permalink
      November 30, 2010 8:31 am

      Well, I exaggerated a little bit with the trash part. I put the second box in the food shelf bag. But yeah, even at $2 a box it wasn’t worth it!


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